A Night Unlike Most Other Nights
Posted: Monday, October 28, 2013 Filed under: 2k13 | Tags: crime, missional living, Northside, RVA, shooting, Urban Life 14 CommentsRevised 10.29.2013 11:57pm – Read here for an update on our prayer gathering and more >>> New. Every. Morning.
Revised 10.29.2013 2pm – At 6pm tonight, we will be meeting in our front yard for prayer for our community and our city. Feel free to come! 2101 Barton Ave, RVA 23222
Tonight was a night NOT like most. Our neighborhood has been riddled with different problems and challenges over the 8+ years I have lived here (and, of course, before as well). But, the last few years, I have been so pleased with how calm things have been. How our community has been strengthened. Tonight, however…that has all been challenged when someone was shot in front of our home at 8:30 in the evening. A bullet came in the front of the house, between the 2 windows above the couch – traveled through the living room and the dining room and into the back wall of the house. All this as Louis and I sat in our customary chairs watching TV in the living room. Meaning, the bullet went just a few feet in front of my eyes….1/2 way between me and the TV.
I am mad. I am angry. I am hurt (not physically of course). Yet, I am also grateful to God for his protection. I am thankful for the neighbors, friends and family who have checked in on us, have hugged us, called us, texted, FB’d, etc. It’s a real encouragement.
I am asking that you pray for me….especially for peace. It is not unusual at all for us to have folks enjoying an awesome night of good food and fellowship at our dining room table at 8:30 at night. It’s not unusual for us to have neighborhood kids and teens sitting on our couch or at our table doing homework, writing essays, watching the World Series, snacking on popcorn or chocolate chip cookies, etc. Our house is a house of peace…which I now feel has been violated.
This, of course, brought back memories from nearly 6 years ago when someone else was shot outside our home on the side street on Louis’s and my 4th date. The gunshot victim lived after being shot 9 times. Praise God! Tonight, yellow police tape hung around our house for the 2nd time.
I am asking that you pray for my community and others like it. As neighbors called and stopped by, everyone had a story about how bullets had at sometime entered their home by forces beyond their control. Pray for healing in our community.
I am asking that you pray for tonight’s victim and his family. Pray for the medical staff at MCV who is treating him. I understand that he was shot once, and it wasn’t fatal.
I am asking that you pray for the shooter. That God will ‘arrest’ him/her even before the police do. That the shooter will ‘surrender’ his/her life to Jesus and find what he/she is looking for. That the shooter will turn himself in and seek the help he/she needs.
I am asking that you pray for the police and detectives, as they tirelessly work to solve these senseless crimes.
I am asking that you pray for our ministry and our friends. I know that these things often scare people away. We have youth and adults who join us in our ministry on a regular basis. Pray that this does not deter folks from wanting to love our community with us.
I am asking that you pray that God will work in and through us to bring glory to His name. May Jesus’ name be known through us during this time. That we won’t miss opportunities to minister to our neighbors. That this won’t be a distraction from our calling.
I am grateful to God for so much this evening. To name a few…
- All of us are fine. God’s angel armies are camped around us and our home. I still praise God, regardless!
- Terence was on restriction…although I really want some of his chocolate chip cookies!!! 🙂
- Marques left just moments before the shoot occurred.
- Shooting wasn’t fatal.
- So many neighbors who came to love, support and hug.
- So many friends who are praying, loving and supporting us via email, phone calls, texts, etc.
- Quick and thorough response of our City’s finest.
And, now, I will answer the question that many of you are probably wondering. The same question we were asked last time a bullet came in the house.
“So…are you packing up your boxes yet?”
And our answer remains the same.
“No. Until God releases us to go or sends us some place else, we will stay.” May God be glorified through this and through us.
For those who are curious…and want to see pictures….see below! Wonder what our insurance agent will say when we call tomorrow…
entry from the outside
up close entry from inside house
from the living room
the exit in the dining room beside the chalkboard
Trick-or-Treat 2013
Posted: Monday, October 21, 2013 Filed under: 2k13 | Tags: community, halloween, neighbors, RVA, SBH, trick or treat Comments Off on Trick-or-Treat 2013
Just Say ‘YES’
Posted: Sunday, October 20, 2013 Filed under: 2k13 | Tags: bike repair, community, fishes and loaves, Southern Barton Heights 4 CommentsHow much margin do you leave in your life for God-size surprises and blessings? Sometimes we find ourselves running so fast from one thing to another, or planning just how things are going to go that we leave little to no room for God’s unexpected treats and encounters. Last night, I was tempted to let that happen. Again. I am soooo grateful that I didn’t try to orchestrate it too much.
After several days of scheduling, we were finally getting together with a couple who were married just 2 months ago. Mentally, I had it all planned out. They were bringing dinner with them, so it was going to be a super night of NOT cooking, a simple night of just throwing dishes in the dishwasher and a quiet dinner and sweet fellowship including catching and listening to the update on the adjustments of married life, the honeymoon, and life in general.
Change #1 and #2 – Our housemate was home, because his intended was traveling this weekend; and then another friend showed up moments before our friends were scheduled to be here. Immediately I started to think… how’s this going to work? Should we invite them to join us? They…and Louis….were enjoying the football game when the newlyweds walked in. Of course, the groom joined right into the game and the bride and I found ourselves on the front porch while dinner (their incredible enchiladas!) cooked in the oven.
Change #3 – David and 3 other neighborhood kids happened by and asked if we had an air pump for their bike tires. I was so enjoying our quiet time on the porch and was so torn. I was tempted to lie or make up some excuse, but was quickly convicted and confirmed that we did have one. We found ourselves in the front yard attempting to help these kids work on their bikes. Funny thing is…we didn’t do a thing but push the button on the air compressor while they did the dirty work.
Change #4 – The guys willingly left the TV game and came out to take a look at the bikes, to no avail. We need new chains, a new tire and a seat. We need a bike repair clinic if anyone is willing!!! When things were wrapping up, the bride asked the kids if they had eaten dinner yet, to which they answered no. Again, I found myself tempted to make them a sandwich and send them on their way, when I remembered we didn’t have any bread in the house and again I was convicted, and said… “come on in!”
Change #5 – Terence had been over earlier in the day and came back to finish what he had started making in the kitchen. Our quiet, intimate dinner for 4 turned into a dinner for 6, and then dinner for 10 and ended with a loud dinner for 11. For those who have eaten at our table, you understand how how table is really meant to be full…and overflowing.
I love how God works and arranges everything. We had more than enough enchiladas to go around. I threw together another salad to go with one the newlyweds brought. Plenty of brownies to be devoured by all. Just like other nights similar to this one, it was like the fishes and the loaves. Voila! Miracle in the making. No one went hungry. Today…as I reflect on the beauty of last night. At any point, I could have said no, but I started thinking about everything I would have missed if I had. To name a few…
- a night full of laughter and silliness,
- 3 new young friends,
- a full table and a full heart,
- the chance to see God multiply the food before our eyes…again,
- the joy of connecting my friends together (for those of you who really know me…you know how much I love to connect people!),
- an opportunity to talk to the kids about CHAT and East End Fellowship, since 2 of the kids live in Church Hill and
- selfishly, a chance to plug all the wonderful reasons the newlyweds should move into SBH. 🙂
So, here’s a question for you…
When was the last time you slowed down and allowed your plans to be changed and were incredibly blessed in the process?
Enjoy more pictures…
Lovestruck
Posted: Tuesday, September 24, 2013 Filed under: 2k13 | Tags: cornel west, John 20, love your neighbor, lovestruck, Luke 4, mass incarceration, Matthew 27, michelle alexander, new jim crow Comments Off on Lovestruck
Earlier today I posted this to Facebook…”A little light reading while Louis sleeps and recovers in the hospital! Been wanting to read this for a while, but after hearing Michelle Alexander speak at CCDA – it became a must-read!”
And, I dove right in to The New Jim Crow, but didn’t make it passed the forward where Cornel West writes…
‘Martin Luther King, Jr called for us to be lovestruck with each other, not colorblind….lovestruck is to care, to have deep compassion, and to be concerned for each and every individual, including the poor and vulnerable.’
Matthew 22:37-4037 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”
Luke 4:16-2116 He went to Nazareth, where he had been brought up, and on the Sabbath day he went into the synagogue, as was his custom. He stood up to read, 17 and the scroll of the prophet Isaiah was handed to him. Unrolling it, he found the place where it is written:
18 “The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
because he has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
and recovery of sight for the blind,
to set the oppressed free,
19 to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”
20 Then he rolled up the scroll, gave it back to the attendant and sat down. The eyes of everyone in the synagogue were fastened on him. 21 He began by saying to them, “Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.”
John 20:21-2221 Again Jesus said, “Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you.”22 And with that he breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit.
What does it really look like to be lovestruck with others???
What does it mean ‘to care, to have deep compassion, and to be concerned for each and every individual, including the poor and vulnerable’?
What does it mean to love your neighbor as yourself?
HELP!!! I’m in need of math tutoring help!
Posted: Sunday, September 22, 2013 Filed under: 2k12, 2k13 | Tags: math, Tutoring Comments Off on HELP!!! I’m in need of math tutoring help!I am so ill prepared for tutoring! This afternoon I took a few minutes between housework stuff to run some neighborhood youngsters through flash cards. Any parents, homeschoolers or teachers out there have any tips for teaching little ones to add and subtract and older ones to multiply??? Seriously. I need help here. Anyone???
Money Matters
Posted: Saturday, September 21, 2013 Filed under: 2k13 | Tags: budget, dave ramsey, grateful, personal money, saving, spending 3 CommentsI wasn’t sure how to start this post off. Nobody really likes to talk about their personal money or how they spend it…or steward it. Money, salaries, spending habits, etc. are considered personal discussions to be had with only close friends and family. So, I’m going to be brave and dive right in. OK?
Since Louis and I got married 5 years ago, we have taken a SERIOUS look at our spending plan or our budget, depending on your school of thought. We did this for a number of reasons – because we wanted to be better stewards of our money and because we knew that the day would come when my job at the bank would end, which it did nearly 3 years ago. We were working toward making it on just Louis’ salary, and we all know pastors don’t get paid what they deserve, especially when you break it down to an hourly wage. But, I won’t go there…because like most teachers, pastors don’t become pastors because it’s a great paying gig. It’s a true calling, well….hopefully, anyway.
We have slashed our expenses significantly. Here are some things we did…
- We received new bids for car and home insurance (which saved us a TON of money! and should have been done LONG time ago.)
- We refinanced the house (at no cost to us!!! YES!!! Thanks, Wells Fargo!).
- We (or I should say LOUIS!!!) negotiated deals with cable/internet. We have VERY limited channels. (every 6 months, Louis tackles this one because this process makes me want to hit someone…hard.)
- We watch a lot more Netflix (or nothing at all).
- We cut off the home phone (because who needs it anyway, right????).
- We changed our home security system.
- We buy a lot less stuff and plan our buying better. You will see me in the same clothes…. a lot. Just replacing the basics. (I did manage to replace my favorite black sweater since it had several holes in the elbow.)
- We sold stuff on Craig’s List. Have done ok here.
- We (with A LOT of help from the neighborhood youth!!!) had a yard sale to help fund the community stuff we do with the kids. (It didn’t generate a lot of cash, but we met some really great neighbors, so we consider it a HUGE success!)
- We followed Dave Ramsey’s plan almost maniacally…using an app currently called EEBA (name is changing soon) which acts as the envelope system that Dave talks about.
- We use our credit card for EVERYTHING (which Dave Ramsey would kill us for!!!) we possibly can, because we pay it off each month AND the bank gives us a lot of cash back when our rewards add up!
- We make it a game. You won’t see us on Extreme Couponing or anything like that, mainly because what we buy doesn’t usually have coupons. But we love to find great deals to cover our fun time. Louis usually wins.
- I told Louis I would give up a lot of things, but hair color would NOT be one of them. At 50, I’m nearly 100% grey (not 50 shades of grey…just grey and white) and I’m not ready to see that in the mirror every day. So, I have grown my hair out…only getting it cut every 3-4 months to help offset the cost of my color.
- Using the Dave Ramsey plan, over the next 6 months, we will pay ourselves back (to the emergency fund) for the car repairs.
- Louis has replaced the brakes, spark plugs and other minor maintenance car repairs at home.
- Terence has noticed we no longer keep a big tub of cookie dough or sodas in the fridge and totally understands, but appreciates the big thing of lemonade we keep in the cabinet. 🙂
So, this is where we are for the month. This has not been a good month for us! Here we are, 2/3rds the way through the month…with 10 days to go…and we are already at our spending limit! Ouch! Even though we planned for an extra car repair expense and a trip to New Orleans, we didn’t account for gifts (although I was tempted to re-gift – I did not succumb to that temptation), and I overspent on groceries today. Yikes! We also intentionally went over last month, thinking we could cover it this month and pay ourselves back. So, as long as I can go the next 10 days without buying anything, we will be OK. I am confident that we will make it!
Here’s our no spending plan….
Louis will be laid up having surgery, so I will have to keep him away from amazon and other internet sites while he’s on the painkillers. I am grateful that we have a cupboard and fridge full of food and a car full of gas (some of which we got at 89cents/gallon thanks to my mom’s savvy fuel perks savings!). And I am grateful for the little coupons from St Mary’s that will cover a couple of meals while I am at the hospital (and a super generous friend who’s going to bring me something DE-lish to eat for dinner on Monday – although I would be MORE than willing to share one of my St Mary’s cafeteria coupons! LOL) And…for some of you who know of our obsession…we are stocked with ‘Booty’… aka Pirate’s Booty, which is our go-to snack of choice. So, we are more than good to go!
Quick interesting story…I was in a class not too long ago with a group of non-profit leaders. I started to share our cost cutting and budgeting/spending initiatives with them over lunch, and they were totally psyched! To the point that they started taking notes, and downloading apps! They suggested that I teach a class. LOL But, I don’t see that happening. We are still learning! So, I am interested in knowing what YOU do. How do you save money? When things get tight, where do you cut? What have we missed? Where else should we look?
Side note: I would be remiss if I didn’t include this! Louis and I are also appreciative for the many gifts and acts of kindness from friends and family! Gift Cards to our favorite restaurants, movie theatres, etc. that we received earlier this year when life really shifted. Surprises in the mail and at our doorstep, which literally made us cry…. you know who you are! Meals and visits when Louis and I were hospitalized earlier this year. Folks who helped out around the house while Louis was laid up – hung cabinets, cut grass, whacked weeds, attic adventures, and so much more. Timely phone calls, emails, texts. Shoulders to cry on when things got really stressful. Ears I could vent to without judgment. I love our generous group of friends, family, and community. Thank you.
With all this cheeky humor aside, we are the most blessed people ever. God’s provisions have been nothing short of AH-mazing, unexplainable, abundant, and rich.
We are so grateful.
Life with Louis is FUN!
Posted: Friday, September 20, 2013 Filed under: 2k13 | Tags: batman, marriage, photo booth, wedding fun Comments Off on Life with Louis is FUN!Life with Louis is just plain ole FUN! He’s great to be silly with. and…he’s really really good at it, too! And for those of you who were upset with Ben as Batman…. I think Louis would totally rock it!
Thanks for a great time at your wedding, Sara and Sam! Many blessed years for the two of you! (Side note….sorry it looks like I’m flipping the bird in the 3rd pic! Not at all intended! Promise!)
Wheels on the Bus Go ‘Round and ‘Round
Posted: Monday, September 2, 2013 Filed under: 2k13 | Tags: Back to School, bus stop, missional, neighbor loving, RPS, RVA, school bus, Southern Barton Heights 1 Comment
Tomorrow all over the metro RVA area, we will see the yellow school buses transporting our future doctors, plumbers, lawyers, bankers, mechanics, secretaries, pastors, recruiters, store clerks, teachers, school board members, mayors and city councilpersons, social workers, construction workers, etc. back to school. Let’s keep them in our prayers…and all that will be involved in their education!
Some kids will be going to school for the first time. The rising 6th graders and freshman will no longer be the BMOC, but will be back on the ‘bottom’ at their new schools. Others have moved and will be going somewhere completely new…maybe even across town where they don’t know anyone…or may not know English. Those who didn’t successfully pass last year, but have a new chance at making it through successfully. Some will be donning their new “Back To School” clothes, while others are wearing something from last year or a hand-me-down. The backpacks will weigh heavily full of all their new school supplies, although some will be without. The bullied may be fearful. The bully is puffing up. The teachers, bus drivers, administrative staff, janitors, and cafeteria staff have all prepared for this day. And we are so grateful for them!
It’s a day with many mixed emotions after a fun-filled summer. So, tomorrow… I plan to get up SUPER early and walk to my neighborhood bus stops to wish the youth well on their first day. I will pray with them and encourage the parents that are waiting with their children. I also plan to meet the bus tomorrow afternoon to celebrate the first day of school with snacks and goodies. I can’t say that I will do that every day, but I hope to do it more often than I have in the past.
It’s a simple way to get to know and love my neighbors and to encourage our future generations.
Anyone willing to do the same in YOUR neighborhood???
I would LOVE to hear about how it goes and learn from you!
Important Note: Please be sure to drive carefully as you go to work, the gym, etc. tomorrow morning…and every morning. Watch for those kiddos as they wait for the bus! And remember to leave some extra time in your commute!
To Give…or Not to Give
Posted: Thursday, August 22, 2013 Filed under: 2k13 | Tags: Amazing Raise, charity, Christian Community Development, GiveRichmond.org, giving, RVA 2 Commentsrevised on 8.24.2013 due to some major typos!
The Amazing Raise 2013, GiveRichmond.com’s 36-hour giving challenge, is right around the corner from 6am on Wednesday, September 18 through Thursday, September 19! IMPORTANT NOTE: This is NOT a request to give! 🙂 But, I have already started receiving emails, tweets, FB messages, videos, FB likes and shares, letters and postcards, and more telling me how I should give to different non-profits.
Plea. After. Plea.
One. Right. After. The. Other.
Soon, I will be asked to give at a certain time, possibly at 2am, to help a non-profit win a specific dollar amount. Fun! (insert sarcasm here).
I have a confession…it really makes me want to scream. Really. Loud. But, before you judge…please keep reading!
My primary God-given gift is ‘GIVING’. If you don’t believe me, ask Louis. He will tell you. We’d be broke (LOL) if he didn’t put the brakes to my natural giving tendency. My thoughts…It’s not mine anyway. It’s all on loan to me…to steward on behalf of God; and I really want to be a good steward of what He has given to us. So…how in the world do I decide where to give??? That’s the part that makes me want to SOL (Scream Out Loud). To make it harder, this year…we are on a MUCH tighter budget!
Louis and I are both relational people. So, we really want to give to organizations that our friends are involved in, founded, are board members, etc. As extroverts, we have a TON of ‘friends’. My goodness…we have ‘friends’ poppin’ out the woodwork asking me to give now! SOL
We want to give where our values align. So, what do we value? We want to see sustainable, transformational change. Where God’s kingdom is being built. Where the Gospel is being proclaimed. Where no harm is being done, especially in the “name of Jesus”. Where there’s more than a ‘good story’. Where the community is involved and have a say in what’s happening.
Like many others, Louis and I subscribe to the CCDA Philosophy and really want to support ministries that are doing development work versus mercy ministry. My thoughts and ideas have also been shaped by experts, authors/speakers and books like Beyond Charity by John M. Perkins, When Helping Hurts by Steve Corbett and Brian Fikkert and Toxic Charity by Bob Lupton. You can hear a podcast of Bob Lupton talking about Toxic Charity during his visit to RVA >> here.
One might ask, “What’s the difference?” Simply put in 3 levels…
Level 1 Mercy Ministry = Hand Out. One person gives. Another receives. There is a need for this, but I think it should be used when it is a real emergency…earthquakes, fires, tornadoes, etc. or when someone really can’t help themselves. examples: Feeding programs. Food banks. Free Markets. Backpacks. Adopt a family at Christmas. Although these ministries make the giver feel good, oftentimes these types of ministries hurt more than they help…causing further enablement, dependency, hoarding, loss of dignity, etc. Bob Lupton says – “Never do for the poor what they have (or could have) capacity to do for themselves.” THINK – Give a man a fish.
Level 2 Betterment or Empowerment = Hand Up. Giving is more reciprocal. A small exchange takes place. Definitely a move in the right direction. Becomes a little more time intensive. More commitment is involved. More listening to the community. Examples: Christmas Stores where donated gifts are sold at 20cents on the dollar. Tutoring. THINK – Teach a person how to fish.
Level 3 Development = Standing Up. This calls for a long-term systemic change and sustainable economic development. This is not an overnight, easy solution. It’s time commitment. Exchange takes place. Doing it with a community not to or for a community. Requires listening to the community and sacrificing your own thoughts and ideas. Examples – Use of lending and investing. Very little grants. Jobs. John Perkins regularly says “The best welfare program is a job.” (see post >> here) Yet according to the cited survey, only 1% of churches do something about jobs. THINK: Teach a person how to own the boat and the pond.
Here’s an example of a sustainable, development concept we LOVE! Maybe one day we will have a LouDawg’s Kitchen afterall… Whatcha think?
As we approach this time of giving, Louis and I will want to ask ourselves some questions before we give of our time, money or resources. Here’s a few that will get us started, but I’m sure we are missing some….
- God – where would You have us give?
- Whose kingdom is being built? God’s or someone else’s?
- Is it development work or mercy ministry?
- Is the work being done with a community or for/to a community?
Miss Marti's House 